The Good Fight?

I got some disheartening news in one of my cases. It stung. Bad. No, I didn't lose on one of my MSJ's, but thanks for asking.

We had to tell the client, and it hurt him too. Bad. The simple fact is that it was an unjust outcome. It was wrong. Does that make me or the client feel any better? Nope.

I know the defendant has that same twisted smirk on his face today that he had throughout the whole proceeding. He's smug and arrogant and it kills me. The thing is? I kept telling myself that I have been doing this, all of this, because I'm fighting the good fight. I'm fighting on behalf of those who would otherwise have no voice. I'm on the noble side. But what has it gotten me? Almost nothing.

The process is disturbing, the outcomes are pathetic, and I ask myself what am I killing myself for? What am I working 7 days a week for if I can't even obtain a just outcome? Why am I missing my niece's dance competitions and not going on dates if I can't even move an anthill, let alone a mountain? Is there even such a thing as "the good fight"?