Who Woulda Thunk?

Tonight, a woman on something akin to tech support talked slowly to me like I was an idiot. Yeah, she is going to regret taking that tone. What I wanted to say was something like "listen, bitch, I have a JD, and you have so little education that you don't even know what the f**k that means." You should admire my restraint. All I said to her was "and what was your name again?" She hesitated before giving it to me. I think she knows I am the WRONG girl to mess with.

I was thinking this evening about how we all are desperately seeking someone else's approval, be it a boss, a spouse, a child, God, a fitness trainer, whomever. Maybe that's why I was so over the moon about my previous post. I feel like the Supreme Court of that state acknowledged my hard work, my skillfully-crafted arguments, and openly rewarded me. This is not to take away from the work my boss did, but it is very much an accomplishment of which I should be proud. I couldn't have become the "lawyer" that I am without him.

So I was talking with my ex just now. I wanted him to share in my happiness in my recent legal victory. I thought he could use some good news. He couldn't have sounded less enthusiastic than if I told him while he was having a prostate exam. So I called him on it. I told him that he really needs to stop wallowing in self-pity because he's pushing away those people who love him and believe in him. And frankly, I was pissed that his "congratulations" seemed extremely flat and insincere.

He asked me after a very real conversation if he could call me tomorrow. I told him I would answer the phone.

After we hung up, it struck me how much of a dichotomy there was between who I was 10 years ago and today. 10 years ago, I was hospitalized because I didn't want to live. It's not that I wanted to die, necessarily, but I was frustrated and scared and couldn't take much more of my life. Today, I encouraged my ex to be more positive and that I could help him with that if he was interested.

So, my accomplishment tally for the last few days:
1. The state Supreme Court vindicated my client's rights, took a stance against unconscionable arbitration clauses, and reinforced employee rights.
2. I have lost 2.5 pounds this week, which totals 10.5 since I started making an effort (about 3 weeks).
3. It turns out I, at least sometimes, want to be positive and encourage others to also be positive.
4. I've survived my first laser hair-removal treatment.

Ex said that, while it seems that bad things happen in sequence, sometimes good things keep on rolling too. Maybe I already rubbed off on him a little bit. Maybe he just wanted to humor me because he knows how insane and bitchy I'll become until I get bar results. And if I don't pass again, Lord only knows how I'll handle it. I just pray that, this time, I don't have to find out. Here's hoping and praying.

Oh yeah, and I'm TOTALLY excited about tomorrow. I just pray Prop 2 passes, and Props 4 and 8 are shot down like kamikaze bombers.